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<title>HAHAHA HA ONE by Annavanpie, EstaJay, fuckitywuckityimgrapejuice (DragonsAddicted), Khaos_honestly</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24467425">HAHAHA HA ONE</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annavanpie/pseuds/Annavanpie'>Annavanpie</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/EstaJay/pseuds/EstaJay'>EstaJay</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonsAddicted/pseuds/fuckitywuckityimgrapejuice'>fuckitywuckityimgrapejuice (DragonsAddicted)</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Khaos_honestly/pseuds/Khaos_honestly'>Khaos_honestly</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Linked Universe - Fandom, Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types, The Legend of Zelda &amp; Related Fandoms</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Linked Universe (Legend of Zelda), Medium Wind, Sonic AU, Wild (Linked Universe) Angst, blame her for her feet kink, no beta we die like Marin, this is a serious fic guys no reallu, this is our magnum opus, this was all Anna's idea not ours</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 01:40:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,113</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24467425</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annavanpie/pseuds/Annavanpie, https://archiveofourown.org/users/EstaJay/pseuds/EstaJay, https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonsAddicted/pseuds/fuckitywuckityimgrapejuice, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Khaos_honestly/pseuds/Khaos_honestly</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It's a Sonic AU what did you expect?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Legend the hedghehog/death, Twink/Mablaze, Zelda/Wildegg/Revali</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>HAHAHA HA ONE</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Sonic Boom au</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sonic - Legend (pink)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shadow- Ravio (purple with green stripes)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Amy- Princess Zelda (botw zelda maybe) (zeldas blue)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Knuckles- Warriors (pee yellow)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tails- Hyrule      </span>
  <span>tails orange (green)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sticks- Twilight (grey with mouldy green accents)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rouge- Four (white with all the four colours on the outfit, outfit stays the canon rouge outfit)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silver- Time (lime green)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Blaze- Malon   (ginger)</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Doctor Eggman- Wild (blue clothes)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mephiles- Sky (grey with green stripes)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chaos-0- Wind (hes made of water, obviously)</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Plot- wild wants to go super saiyan and everyone is saying please no</span>
</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>
  <span>Rotund was the human clad in blue, surrounded by 7 gems of nonspecific colours, praying to chaos above that he could become what he’s always dreamed to be; super saiyan. </span>
  <span>He chanted over and over that the gods would hear his prayer. </span>
  <span>Sadly for him the coolest, fastest pinkest hedgehog around just blasted into the scene with one finger in the air laughing “haha ONE!” </span>
  <span>Doctor Wildegg released a gutteral screech, “goddamn you Legend the Hedgehog I’m gonna piss on your little prick of a girlfriend’s grave, stop thwarting my plans I swear to chaos-,” he watched as one by one his guardian robots fell to the pink menace, having an aneurysm.  </span>
  <span>Legend then cackled like a maniac and summoned the Chaos Rupees to surround him, evolving to his higher form and going full on super saiyan, causing Doctor Wildegg to screech in distress.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aww heck you took the Chaos Rupees you dastardly hedgehog. Now i can never win!” Dr Wildegg cried like the true buffoon he is. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The twin tailed fox, Hyrule, flew in, ass high head low, and grabbed his now deep red super saiyan friend and carried him away into the distance, just to taunt the round human, taking the emeralds with them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wow Legend :D!” Hyrule exclaimed, “You sure showed him! Wowee!”</span>
</p><p><span>“Shut up stop being weird Hyrule.” Legend groaned ultra dramatically, absolutely done with Hyrule’s bullshit. Little did he know Hyrule was planning on ending Legend’s entire bloodline...starting with smothering him with his stupid ugly bandanna. </span><span>The bandanna had started white in colour, but over time and with Legends filthy gremlin habits to boot, it had turned a nasty brown, never to be seen as its previous, pristine, pure, white. </span><span>As if to emphasize this point, Legend took the bandananananana and wiped his giant hedgehog feet with it while dangling in the air.</span> <span>One of the authors, the one that was talking about thier foot fetish (*cough cough the one with silver the hedgehog’s colour)was not allowed to talk about feet anymore, and the plot progressed. A purple blur flew across the scene and bonked Hyrule and Legend out of the sky. It was Shadow Ravio here for your bones. </span></p><p>
  <span>Doctor Wildegg shook in his boots, absolutely quaked, he was keen to get the fuck out of there, he didnt want his bones to get stolen. At the same time, he wanted to know what it felt like to get so high that you went super saiyan, he wanted that knowledge so badly. Perhaps, just maybe, Ravio the Edgelord Hedgehog could teach him. </span>
  <span>He tried to get Ravio’s attention but the purple hedgehog was yelling too loudly and drowned out Wildegg with exclamations of, “Damn damn damn chaos rupees damn damn damn it swears swears edgy edge guns damn chaos,” so Wildegg decided to use his robot to kidnap him instead.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Legend and Hyrule watched them for a solid five seconds, wondering if it was really worth it to save Ravio the Edgelord Hedgehog then realised it really didn’t matter because he didn’t have those banger Chaos Rupees and now they could go home and smoke Hyrule’s entire stash. Yes an 8 year old fox had a weed stash. Fuck you.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fuck he wanted those chaos rupees. God damn they looked so fine. So damn fine. TAKE ME! </span>
  <span>Why did he want the chaos rupees, you ask? To go super saiyan? Well, partially. That was only half the story. Queue theme intro.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Elsewhere, everyone’s best friend Warriors the Echidna Fortnite danced the the music in his head while the world began crumbling around him because Warriors just vibes with whatever the world throws at him at this point. </span>
  <span>He was a bit of an absolute prick, but it was fine, he got a free pass because he lived alone like he deserved to. </span>
  <span>He was the only valid character at this point tbh.</span>
  <span> How DARE you say that when Hyrule Tails exists ANnavanpiss? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Memphis Tennisky was straight up vibing in his gamer pad when doctor wildeggass himself summoned him from the depths of Gamer Stink™. </span>
  <span>Wildegg was straight-up flabbergasted and the vibes were absolutely terrible and all he wanted to do was punch something so he took m e m p h i s t e n n i s k y and vibe checked him like how i feel right now. </span>
  <span>Thankfully for Memphistophalesky this was all dr wildegg’s imagination, they were still in his tilted gamerpad, about to bust out some sick fortnite funnies and laughs. “</span>
  <span>Every moment we stray further from god,” wildegg says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am not surprised you don’t respect me, dr wildegg, seeing as I am an alpha gamer while you are a beta cuck but that it alright because the only gods in this world are the fortnite gods. now sit in your seat and play the fortnite funnies or i’ll piss on your wife again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wildegg frowned but did as he was told. </span>
  <span>Wild eggsbenedict was proven to be the worst fortnite player and unfinniest person alive, not to anyone’s surprise because this was wildegg, only the true master of fornite funnies would ever be able to defeat the true horrors of the youtube algorithm and make a viral video, mr jacksfilms himself.</span>
</p><p><span>“Have you ever licked a teabag?” Zelda asked, no one knows when she got there but she was there.</span> <span>Wildegg, looking for any excuse to cover up his horrible non-existent fortnite skills, grabbed Zelda’s tea bag and gurgled it like a champion.</span><span> “wOW KiNKY” shouted Legend yelled, dropping down from the sky like the true smooth brained gamer he is. </span><span>“That’s some pretty tough talk from a fella with a small cock”. Horrified, Wildegg reeled back in fright, kissing the sweet, pristine floor of his evil lair.</span> <span>He died immediately. </span></p><p>
  <span>“NO MY GAY LOVER!” Zelda yelled using the power of the piss emeralds to chaos control him back to life. </span>
  <span>Unfortunately, even with the power of the gays, invoked by her royal pissiness, this did not work, and Wildegg stayed as dead as my grandpa. </span>
  <span>He almost went super saiyan, it was almost the best day ever. </span>
  <span>RIP Wildegg. The group looked at each other, not really knowing what to do - after all, this wasn’t like Wildegg, usually he just comes back to life with the bullshit op mipha’s grace power but off course he doens’t have that anymore because this is LU guys - anyway the group decided that first they should plan a funeral for Wildegg because he deserved a proper burial. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a beautiful ceremony—the stars were blooming, the sky was bright red, and storm clouds definitely weren’t gathering. Upon seeing Wildegg’s lifeless corpse, Stwicks collapsed sobbing, as his life’s purpose had finally faded. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Medium chaos-W1nD appeared on the scene, really it was through the toilet water but no one needed to know that, he gazed upon the corpse of Wildegg, then to Stwicks, then to that last unnamed entity he didn’t care about, just as he was about to leave the ghost of wildegg appeared once more. </span>
  <span>“Please chaos-W1nD! You must avenge my death! In order for me to move on into the next life I need someone in the living world to give me the power of super-saiyan from beyond the grave so I can fulfill my life’s purpose-” Wildegg rambled.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Meanwhile, in the time dimensi I on, Blaze and her simp Twink were galavanting across the galaxy, almost but never quite hitting first base. </span>
  <span>Time looked at Mablaze with a disturbed look on his face, “I feel a disturbance in the force,” he said. </span>
  <span>Mablaze also had the higher ground so no matter what he did to try and get on Mablaze’s level he would always be her sad sad bottom. </span>
  <span>Looking into his pale blue orb weaver spiders, Mablaze, despite her obvious superiority, nodded for him to continue. </span>
  <span>Time looked out into the distance dramatically, “We need to go back, back to the future,” he said, and Mablaze just about had enough of his movie references, as this was a sonic fic, so the only movie references allowed here have to be Sonic the Hedgehog 2020 starring Ben Shwartz as Sonic. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“LIES! LIES LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIES!!!!” Frouge screamed, smashing his way into the room sporting his gigantic large one polygon titty for all to see, what an icon. </span>
  <span>Bouncing uncontrollably to the memorial, titty and all, he landed on his knees in front of his worst rival—a piss emerald.</span>
  <span> In a massive display of strength, Frouge picks up the corpse, bouncing it off his one giant polygon titty, directly into the arms of the waiting hot spring. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then a giant gust of wind erupted from the spring, launching the corpse high into the air - not that it was much of a corpse anymore, it was more reminiscent of a peeled boiled egg about to burst.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Revali the gayass whispered under his breath as he watched his wife fall into the spring, “Revalis gay was ready… but eggwild was not.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kass’s theme began to play at a rapid pace, signaling the end of the memorial, and Wildegg’s ghost still had not convinced Medium chaos-w1nd that helping him was a good idea. </span>
  <span>“Haha WELL that’s a big ol tragedy right there, well time to go now bye bye!” Medium chaos-w1nd said flushing himself back down the toilet. </span>
  <span>As the field emptied, Mablaze and Twink tumbled out of a shoddily made portal, the stink of the energy surrounding them.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>The stench was palpable - no tangible, wrapping foul tendrils around the its unfortunate victims leaving them with no hopes of escape. </span>
  <span>Disgustang. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Twink stood up, posing dramatically, and shouted to all who hadn’t already passed out from the stank of the portal, “Here ye! You all are in grave danger! We must revive Wildegg or this dimension is doomed to collapse! Listen well, or perish in a fiery demise!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay boomer,” said Hyrule who was apparently there along with Legend and Warriors (still stuck in his memories of 19 aught 7). </span>
  <span>He stood in a sassy pose, hip thrusted against his hand, like every valley girl could possibly dream…..but, unbeknownst to his companions…..he had a great secret…..hemmorraids. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Twink made the mistake of looking up towards Mablaze for direction, meeting her eyes, to which she glared and let the word “simp” fall from her lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But who was he to deny the truth, there was nothing else to say in response - only to fall on his knees before his requiatined love. </span>
  <span>He wept, tears falling down his furry face wetting his soft pointed muzzle, quills downturned and glowing aqua hands shaking. </span>
  <span>Mablaze shook her head, glaring, “This is why you don’t deserve rights.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“well thats not very nice,” Legend the hedgehog said with the most disgusted disappointed voice while shaking his one finger. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Revali, still in the midst of his gay mourning crisis, frowned at them and asked “what did you two power struggle weirdos hope to accomplish by coming and desecrating this funeral more than a titty and a hot spring already have?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re here to fix the universe!” Twink yelled submissively, “We’re here to save Wildegg!!!” And in an unprecedented act of unsolicited revenge, he threw a gun at Legend the pisshog, killing him on sight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His lifeless body dropped to ground while his soul emerged from his chest - hovering in confusion at his unexpected demise. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Memphis Sky rose from wherever he fucked off to, and summoned the chaos rupees into the mortal realm, going super saiyan in the process for a moment before Doctor Eggwild rose from his very grave to vibe check him back to purgatory, stealing the chaos rupees and fulfilling his lifelong dream of going super saiyan. </span>
  <span>Wildegg wept, for his dream was futile - he did not receive the happiness he craved from the chaos rupees. But his deal with the devil was fulfilled, at least, and he could finally move on to the afterlife. </span>
  <span>Softly in his ear, Legend’s soul whispered “I can’t die” before medium chaos w1nd slammed dunked his body back into his smol hedgehog body. ANd the cycle began anew.</span>
</p>
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